The nightmare of a breakfast I'm talking about was actually the anti-Paleo devil. It consisted of cereal, muffins, juice, donuts and other temptress pastries. Admitting defeat, I paid a tiny bit extra to have a Mexican omelet and (double) order of bacon delivered to my door. I went back to sleep until it got there. Totally worth it. And just to clear it up, I'm well aware sushi, sake and beer aren't Paleo. Unfortunately, I'm not an alien and don't always eat perfectly. But, I really blame it on you readers because I hit 1200+ views on Thursday (with a total of only 5 posts) and I HAD to celebrate. So, thanks guys, thanks a lot.
Also, congrats to my gym for kicking some seriiiious booty today at the Garage Games! They took 2 places out of each division; 1st and 3rd in RX Men, 2nd and 3rd in Scaled Men, 2nd and 3rd in Scaled Women. Y'all are all amazing competitors and I'm proud to call you mine!
I've had some people asking more about naughty beverages that won't throw you off the wagon completely. Does alcohol fit into the traditional Paleo lifestyle? No, not really. Does it fit into MY Paleo lifestyle OCCASIONALLY? I'm going to give that a super conclusive and realistic yes. Eating Paleo can sometimes feel like living in a food jail. Though it would be a jail that has really amazing food, it's still hard for most of us to go to a restaurant and find meat/vegetables that aren't soaked in soybean oil and wheat flour. At times, this can cause us to just play it safe and stay home, causing a serious damper on social lives. I'm not saying eat clean 7 days per week then ruin it by drinking a 6 pack 3 nights per week, but I know that for me and most others, it isn't sustainable or realistic to think that I'm not going to go to happy hour every once in a while or have a drink at a birthday dinner. Like I always say, you have to pick your battles. It just takes a little prioritizing to figure out what's more important. A couple glasses of wine, beers (or whatever) every night or a faster 400 meter sprint and a clean and jerk PR? Things like that. I know for me, my happy medium is going out maybe once a week, and when I do I'm very careful. My life revolves around Crossfit, Paleo cooking, school and my family; that's what's important and fun for me, and that's okay. It's also okay if what's fun to you is drinking vodka out of a beer bong. That being said, let's talk about good choices.
Beer
With the main ingredients being malt, water, yeast, hops and gluten grains; they're all mostly high calorie/high carb and make you swell, due to the grain content. Sorgum (gluten-free) beer does exist. I have tried it and wasn't a fan, but you may be. Consistent beer drinking leads to excess fat deposits due to how easy it is to sit and chug lots of them without thinking twice. Though a light beer has around 100 calories and a regular beer has 140, those 100 calories can turn into 300 in an hour or less. 3,500 calories equals a pound of weight. That means that if you add just five regular beers a week, without changing your eating/exercise habits, you can gain 1 lb. every 3.5 weeks.
Vodka, Gin, Rum, Whiskey etc.
Despite what we have always thought, not all vodka is made from potatoes and rum from sugarcane. Most liquors are grain-based nowadays. And by now, I hope we all know that nothing good comes from any type of grain. If you're going this route, it's best to choose a distilled liquor. Distilled liquor turns from liquid to gas before reaching the bottle, meaning it isn't possible for gluten to exist in this environment. Some studies have shown that there is still some gluten content, so drink at your own risk. Notice how you feel when you drink one liquor vs. another. That's your body trying to tell you something.
Tequila
When you're picking out a tequila, go with 100% agave. This kind is absolutely not made with grains and distilled. Tequila is made from the agave plant, which looks a lot like a cactus. This is the best Paleo choice, despite its high production in naturally-occuring sugars.
Mead
Basically, it's wine made with honey. It's delicious and a good Paleo choice. But, like the tequila its high in naturally-occuring sugars so watch out for the possibility of a killer hangover.
Hard Apple Cider
Same as Mead, but made with apples. Look for cold pasteurized and organic apples, if possible. Watch out for additives like excessive sugars, sulfites, potassium sorbate, sodium benzoate, etc. These can cause allergic reactions, migraines etc. and are just not something we want coursing through our bloodstream.
Wine
Dry and red, preferably. Just like the apple ciders, look for organic, minimal sugar added, no sulfites etc.
As far as cheap, good wine goes.. I highly recommend this one.
Mixers
Tonic Water- Skip it. Most of them have high fructose corn syrup, creepy sugar-like substances that you can't pronounce, preservatives and quinine. Quinine and tonic water gained their popularity in the early 1800s, to help with the prevention and treatment of Malaria. But, today it comes with some side effects. Quinine has been linked to thrombocytopenia, a drop in the blood's platelet count (causing internal bleeding) and kidney damage. Thankfully, low doses aren't enough to trigger these, but it's still scary stuff. The alcohol itself is poison enough.
*Obviously, syrups, sodas and sugar-y juices are out; so suck it up and order it neat or on the rocks. If not, stick with seltzer, regular water or soda water.
I can't stress it enough, read your labels! Ideally, we want everything to be gluten-free, free of additives and as close to organic as possible, so just check it twice. And if you're questioning how I know so much about alcohol, I worked in a bar for quite a while and they actually made me study these things. Also, I'm a junior in college. Now, go to the kitchen and make these!
Paleo Margaritas
(Not my picture, but that's what you need)
Sea salt
2 lime slices or wedges
1/4 cup tequila blanco
2 tablespoons agave nectar
2 tablespoons fresh lime juice
1. Rub a slice of lime around the rim of the glass, then dip the glass into a bowl filled with sea salt. Half a rim is better, the less the better.
2. Combine the tequila, agave nectar, and lime juice in a shaker and mix.
3. Fill glass with ice and pour over.
4. Keep your clothes on and don't dance on tables. Or do, whatevs.
Do not buy canned lime juice unless you want me to come to your house and throw it at you. Also, you use the agave instead of triple sec and use silver or white tequila from 100% blue agave (get the good stuff!). I've made these many, many times and never met anyone who didn't think they were delicious. I've also experimented and made them in a blender and used fresh squeezed oranges, lemons, honey, watermelon etc. All good ideas!
Bonus post! For the non-drinkers..
Hot Cocoa
(I realize I need to step up my game with the pictures. I'll be breaking out the Canon Rebel soon.)
2 cups unsweetened almond milk
2 cups unsweetened coconut milk
1 tsp. coconut oil
2-3 tbs. unsweetened cocoa powder
Lots of cinnamon, nutmeg, apple pie spice if you have it
1 tsp. (ish) honey or agave nectar
1. Simmer milks on low for about 5 minutes.
2. Whisk in cocoa powder, spices, oil, honey.
3. Continue to stir, on a little of a higher heat, for about 3 minutes.
Because it's 4 degrees outside and I'm tired of hot tea, I made this tonight. Took about 10 minutes and all from things I had laying around the kitchen. So, so glad I did!
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